staying the course

I think ‘therapists’ often become yet another substitute for intimacy, rather than a stepping stone. I think the MOST a GOOD therapist really has to offer is a sympathetic ear. Which is something ANY person could offer, if only we were all taught how to do this. The idea that we should pay some random stranger an exorbitant fee to be sat in a chair and treated like small children AGAIN is too much for me to stomach. The power imbalance inherent in the relationship may actually be the most damaging and destructive part of it, I think.

I must armor myself against this person. He’s very insidious, very persuasive. He reminds me of – someplace I really don’t want to go, ever again. Snakes slithering, that sort of thing. Actually feel my skin crawling. He’s not ‘the devil’, just someone I would have a hard time resisting because he’s an expert GASLIGHTER. Which is something EVERY SINGLE PERSON in my family has pulled on me at some point, knowingly or unknowingly.

Grasshopper, you CAN choose to simply not see him. Your spidey sense is tingling – don’t let him GUILT you into this. That’s what the word ‘arrogant’ did – he’s an expert manipulator, a CLASSIC narcissist.

And despite your empathy for the pain all such people suffer, you must NOT sacrifice yourself for him, or any other like him.

You must keep looking for what YOU need.

He is too wily an opponent for you – your little sword is still tiny, and, while very sharp, not effective against such monsters as these.

You must simply walk away.

Men like this simply derail your life. And not in a good way – they’re the emotionally equivalent of a football tackle, who tries to knock your feet out from under you and keep you off balance. The tricky part is that they do it with WORDS instead of actions, so it’s a bit harder to catch them at it.

And I don’t want to have to WORK that hard. In fact, I don’t HAVE to.

I choose the EASY path.