the 'upper hand'.

There's something else that's bugging me, getting under my skin, sticking in my craw, chapping my ass: This 'older woman' thing.

Seems to be about *defining* the 'relationship', which is - a power and control thing, right?

I mean, *are* there guys who actually *want* to be in an actual equal relationship?

Because defining things that way suggests a power imbalance that I don't accept. I mean, if *women* were writing the 'rules', we sure as hell wouldn't be saying 'the older woman'. We'd talk about it as if it was completely normal, just as a man, oh, say, ten or even 20 years older than his partner is considered 'normal' these days.

FUCK your double standards and the bullshit horse they rode in on.

You don't get to have it both ways.

Either: Women are EQUAL, and you LIKE it that way, and therefore you'll STOP with this fucking bullshit; or? You're lying through your fucking TEETH - you LOVE the fucking power differential, and will go to any lengths necessary to maintain it, up to and including tying yourself in complete fucking verbal, emotional and psychological knots to keep the other person baffled, bewildered and bemused by your fucking

BULLshit.