it is RIGHT to protect yourself against people you don’t trust

feeling guilt

for protecting myself.

My mother taught me that
protecting myself?

was = to SHUTTING HER OUT.

So I was not allowed to shut her out, though SHE was allowed to shut ME out. The power inequity, once again.

So I learned to have boundaries to protect *her*, but *not* to protect *me*.

How fucked up is *that*????

And I don’t blame myself.

Positive spin (hourglass spinning here while I try to think of something):

I now *call* her on her bullshit. I *draw* my lines in the sand, for *me*, and I *enforce* them. She does not get to get *away* with this ‘one way’ bullshit any more.