Suspicious of people’s motives?

I actually *prefer* people who come right out and *say* what they want, for the aforementioned reason (somewhere) that I am really *not* a good guesser, and I *hate* being put in that position.

I was just reading on MetaFilter (again), some question where a guy (geek, nerd type) was made uncomfortable by people ignoring his *words* in favor of what his body language and/or facial expression was conveying. He seemed to think that his ‘stated’ expressions should trump any ‘secret’ language his body was putting out that other people could read but *he* couldn’t.

Wow! I thiought, while reading it – this guy is really fucked up!

And yet? I think his situation is more common than not – maybe he’s even a little *ahead* of the game by at least *knowing* that he doesn’t know how to read his own body language (still shaking my head at that concept.)

So how do I get from all that to what I said at the top of this post?

People (in *my* life, anyway) often seem to expect me to just *know* what they’re thinking and what they want or need.

Maybe it’s because I *do* it so often? Interpret, that is, based on non-verbal signals?

Well, maybe I need to just *stop* reading between the lines, and let people do their *own* dang communicating! Part and parcel of the whole “stop taking care of other people” idea.

***
I guess that’s what feels ‘manipulative’ about it – people who don’t know their own feelings and motivations seem to ask for things indirectly, sort of expecting you to ‘mind read’ or something.

And so it feels, sometimes, as if *maybe* the reason they do this is because their motives are not so honorable? Hm.