WELCOME TO THE MEN'S CLUBThat last sentence is an important point, because whenever a woman is trying to convey her sense of being 'left out' of the giant boyz club that is the world, she is often offered (irrelevant, in my view) examples of how so-and-so (usually the speaker in question) is excepted from said behavior.
Homosociality and the Maintenance of Hegemonic Masculinity
by Sharon R. Bird
This study focuses on multiple masculinities conceptualized in terms of sociality, a concept used to refer to nonsexual interpersonal attractions. Through male homosocial heterosexual interactions, hegemonic masculinity is maintained as the norm to which men are held accountable despite individual conceptualizations of masculinity that depart from that norm. When it is understood among heterosexual men in homosocial circles that masculinity means being emotionally detached and competitive and that masculinity involves viewing women as sexual objects, their daily interactions help perpetuate a system that subordinates femininity and nonhegemonic masculinities.
Nonhegemonic masculinities fail to influence structural gender arrangements significantly because their expression is either relegated to heterosocial settings or suppressed entirely.
The point being, if you *only* make your 'non-hegemony-reinforcing' moves in private, where nobody can see them but me and you, then they have
no effect
on the larger social problem of how women are perceived and treated.
If you want CREDIT for being AN ADVANCED, pro-woman human being?
Walk the talk *in public*, for ALL TO SEE.
Openly.
Your *fear* of doing so? Well, guess what? The retribution *you* fear?
Women deal with every
single
day.
Every fucking HOUR and minute of our waking lives. Not just for speaking up against our oppression, but also for the basic crime of
EXISTING WHILE FEMALE.
You won't get any sympathy from me.
***
Along the lines of 'crocodile tears' from the oppressor, a quote from this blog, http://www.youngchicagoauthors.org/girlspeak/swaggerlowdown.htm (bolds mine):
And even most men who do not overtly disrespect or degrade women believe it's a woman's responsibility not to accept the dishonorable treatment she experiences. They believe a woman should "leave" if a man is beating her; or she should dress "properly" if she doesn't like being smacked on her apple bottom; or she should not "give it up" on the first date if she wants a second one; or it is up to a woman to carry herself in a manner that demands value. This year alone, I have conversed with men who hold these positions. But these same positions are still misogynistic at the core. These same positions are the basis by which men that treat women poorly, do so. These same positions leave us to gather that some women deserve respect while others do not.Another interesting conversation on the subject here: http://hugoschwyzer.net/2010/11/15/a-few-good-men-new-research-on-problems-with-male-allies/ (please note: I'm generally not a fan of Hugo S., I think he's a bullshitter par excellence, a classic snake-on-wheels. However, "Even a broken clock is right twice a day," or some such relevant, pithy aphorism. Actually, it's the comments thread that interested me more than the original article - some good ideas there.)
Most importantly, these positions remove men from any responsibility of re-defining our roles in gender consciousness.
Therefore, my challenge to those who harbor these positions is to locate the place where we stop blaming the oppressed for their oppression and press the oppressor to be accountable to change his behavior.
No comments:
Post a Comment